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Score of Oscar was a wily bird
It always amuses me how many different names exist for a backside and this list is incomplete! The first verse is twice the length of the rest to introduce Oscar. The punch line of each verse in the last line is usually shouted rather than sung.

The boy stood on the burning deck,
His arse against the mast, his arse against the mast,
He said I'll stay here just like this,
'till Oscar Wilde's gone passed, Oscar Wilde's gone passed.
But Oscar was a wily bird,
He tossed the boy a crown, tossed the boy a crown,
And as he stooped to pick it up,
(shouted)
He had his bit of brown,
(sung)
Had his bit of brown.

CHORUS:
Star of the evening,
Bloody great fucking beautiful evening star,
Star of the evening,
Shining on the shithouse door.

Now Oscar was a wily bird,
He tossed the boy a fritter, tossed the boy a fritter,
And as he stooped to pick it up,
He woofed it up his shitter, woofed it up his shitter.

CHORUS:

He tossed the boy a parcel and woofed it up his arsehole.
He tossed the boy a plectrum and woofed it up his rectum.
He tossed the boy a quarry face and woofed it up his orifice.
He tossed the boy a plum and woofed it up his bum.
He tossed the boy a poof and woofed it up his chuff.
He tossed the boy a taxi and woofed it up his jacksie.

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