If I were the marrying kind,
Which, thank the Lord, I'm not, sir,
The kind of man that I would marry,
Would be a rugby hooker.
He'd hook balls, I'd hook balls
We'd both hook balls together;
We'd be alright in the middle of the night,
Hooking balls together.
If I were the marrying kind,
Which, thank the Lord, I'm not, sir,
The kind of man that I would marry,
Would be a big prop forward.
He'd hold it up, and I'd hold it up,
We'd both hold it up together;
We'd be alright in the middle of the night,
Holding it up together.
Continue with:
Second row forward - pushing hard.
Rugby flanker - screwing the scrum.
Big loose forward - sniffing arse.
Rugby scrum half - putting it in.
Rugby stand-off - whipping it out.
Inside centre - passing it out.
Wing three-quarter - coming early.
Rugby full-back - kicking balls.
...plus lots of alternatives and additions.
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