Spring 2019 in New Zealand

Wales played Ireland in Cardiff and will meet them again next week in Dublin for their final warm up games before the RWC. Scotland travel to Tiblisi to play Georgia before there return match at Murrayfield next week. If you are interested in the Rugby Union Internationals and the NZ domestic game then read on...

With a Welsh team like the one Gatland selected it was impossible to gauge the likely RWC team prospects. It seemed very unrehearsed and full of mistakes whereas Ireland were practised and efficient capitalising on the Welsh mistakes. Only when Rhys Patchell came on in the second half and began to direct play in addition to scoring a fine try himself did Wales look threatening. They left it too late to catch Ireland by that time and lost the game 15-22. Gatland will not be too worried by the loss and Schmidt will be relieved that Ireland looked to have improved after their English beating. Interesting game next week in Dublin but I suspect both coaches will be playing their cards close to their chests.

Scotland took Georgia to the cleaners in Tiblisi 10-44. SKY did not screen the game here in NZ but will the replay next week at Murrayfield.

Mitre 10 Cup 4th week

More blood will be spat by Bro Phil as Otago again successfully defended the Ranfurly Shield by beating Manawatu 37-20 in Dunedin. Wellington just managed to beat Counties Manukau 29-22 and Canterbury finally chalked up their first win this year at home to lowly Southland 80-0, All Black Ryan Crotty scoring two of their 10 tries. Manawatu and Southland have not won a game so far this season.
Waikato drew with Auckland 20-20 at Hamilton and Northland lost to Hawkes Bay 28-43. Just for the record the city of Auckland has three teams in the competition; Auckland, North Harbour and Counties Manukau.

Our Bay of Plenty Steamers played North Harbour Auckland away. The Steamers struck first but Harbour had the best of the first quarter and equalled the score with a converted try before scoring again to go ahead 14-7. The Bay came back at them to equal the score once again then again in extra time just before the break and went over the try line to take the lead. That lead was never lost and they came home with a 19-27 win, stopping Harbour getting a losing bonus point.

Taranaki Bulls hosted Tasman Mako, a team bulging at the seams with Super Rugby players and AB's like Crockett, Ethan Blackadder (son of Tod), Patterson, Christie, Frizell, David Havili and Liam Squire but the Bulls fought hard against superior opposition and just failed to secure a losing bonus point finishing on 18-28. I used to think that the Bridgnorth rugby ground had a pretty attractive location but the Taranaki ground with snow capped Mount Egmont behind the goal must affect place kickers who love the mountains! Tasman who are based in Nelson move to the top of the premiership with this win.

I know that many of you are heartily sick of Brexit as am I so of you do not want to read any more about it then do not click here...

I common cry from those insisting the UK must not leave without a deal is that it will result in economic chaos. They now propose to further delay Brexit if a deal can not be reached. They seem unable to understand they are causing more economic chaos than would be the case if we left without a deal by further delaying Brexit. They are also lacking intelligence if they think these tactics are going to result in the EU bettering the deal with one they can accept. It is more likely that the EU now thinks Brexit can be stopped never mind a new deal.

It has been reported that some Investment Bankers are now saying that a Jeremy Corbine government would be better than a no deal Brexit. Do these guys live on the same planet?

It is time we had a clear out of the dross that has accumulated in Westminster with a general election. The opinion polls put Boris with an 11% lead over Corbine but the problem of the Brexit party remains. They could split the vote and let in the opposition. Then there is the possibility of an unholy alliance between Labour, LibDems and the SNP as all those parties would selfishly sacrifice any conscience to grab power. What we need is a "government of the people, by the people, for the people" to quote Abraham Lincoln and it needs a substantial majority or we will be back to square one.

The problem with the last election is that 85% of the electorate voted for parties whose manifesto's promised to honour the referendum result and leave the EU. There was no mention of deals in the referendum or in the manifesto's that said a deal with the EU was a condition of our leaving which is something the remain faction now claim is what we all voted for. The electorate were gullible and believed that Brexit was no longer an issue as both parties were similar so they could vote on other matters. Problem was that a substantial number of MP's in both main parties were lying toadies and although they stood for election on those manifesto's they had no intention of supporting Brexit.
Once elected they proceeded to work to disrupt the Brexit process with the ultimate objective of keeping the UK an EU member or at least an associate one.

Mrs May was a PM who never had any conviction about Brexit and could not organise a piss-up in a brewery let alone organise an election campaign or negotiate an acceptable withdrawal from the EU. She even managed to lose her working majority in the process and had to rely on the DUP to keep her in power. Now Boris has lost even that majority after the aforesaid prat joined the LibDems which he has made worse by sacking 21 rebels (but they can come back if they are good boys and girls and fall into line). Nothing of the flying porcine creatures were to be seen around Westminster!

The British electorate are not fools even though they were taken for one the last time. Many of those MP's we elected are not fit for purpose as they have changed their positions on the major issue of Brexit. At the next election Boris must reach a non-aggression agreement with the Brexit party so they do not stand against one another. That is the only way to defeat the current opposition with our first past the post voting system. The price that Nige would want may be hard to accept but it is the only way I can see we have any chance of electing a government with a good working majority and it may be that we end up with a Tory/Brexit party coalition. Heaven help us and the economy if it's a Labour/SNP/LibDem one.

We both voted for Cheltenham MP Alex Chalk last time who is a Tory remainer but has remained faithful to the manifesto he was elected on saying the democratic wishes of the people who voted to leave the EU must be respected. We will both vote the same way next time provided Cheltenham council can get their collective fingers out and get us back on their register as overseas voters.

For those readers who might be interested in the history of the British Parliament here is a link to an article by Historian David Starkey in the Daily Mail who explains how parliament made the same mistakes back in the 17th century as they are making today.
I don't like the bloke but I do respect his knowledge of historical fact.

For the more discerning amongst you England's exploits on the cricket field are recounted here....

The day started well for England when Broad had Sandy Warner caught behind in the first over in the usual way for a duck who trudged off to the usual boos. A few overs later Broad also had the other opener, Harris, lbw who referred it and lost, out for 13.

They returned much later when the rain stopped or at least slowed to a drizzle and Labuschagne quickly celebrated his 4th 50 in his last 4 innings. This guy is a serious batsman and why he was not selected on merit from day one in the series I'll never know.
Sometime later Smithy belts Stokes through the covers for 4 to make his 50 but the next over, Ciderman Overton clean bowls Labuschagne for 67 with the score now 144 for 3 as in comes Head.

At tea the score had progressed to 170 without further loss and they never reappeared as play was abandoned just after 6pm with Smith on 60 and Head on 18.
Archer bowled poorly and never more than 85mph, 10mph below the speed he was bowling in the last test and there are fears he may have been over used. Weather forecast is more of the same tomorrow.

Day Two

This was the day the wheels fell off Englands bowling attack. Archer failed to get a wicket while Leach had double centurion Smithy caught on 118 but it was a no ball. Stokes is unlikely to bowl again in this series after he sustained a shoulder injury.
Their fielding was pretty useless as well with Tim Paine being dropped twice.

The day started well enough with Broad trapping Head lbw for 18. Then Leach had Wade caught at mid-on by Root for 16. Smithy made his first ton just before lunch and Oz went in for pie and chips on 245 for 5.

After lunch Paine played a captains innings until Smith was caught for 118 but as you can see he wasn't as Leachy's foot was out of the crease. From hereo to wanker in one game!!
At the third attempt they finally had Paine out caught behind from the first ball after tea from Overton for 58 but he and Smithy had put on 145 and taken the score on to 369 for 6.

Cummins didn't hang around long as Leachy had him caught by Stoksey in the slips for 4. Starcky then played a fine innings holding up his end for Smithy to score his 2nd ton. Dropped on 65, survived Leachy's no ball on 118 but you need a bit of luck to make 200 and he deserved this his third Ashes double century.

Rooty finally had him caught by Denly for 211 going for the runs and Oz were in a commanding position on 438 for 8 then the tail wagged. Starcky and Lyon took the score on to 497 for 8 before declaring and putting England in to bat for 10 overs during which time Cummins had Denly caught by Wade for 4. Overton was night watchman who survived the final 3 overs. England can rely on Cidermen for this delicate task!

So Day two finished with England on 23 for 1 with Burns on 15 and Overton on 3. They will need divine intervention from the rain gods tomorrow or a few more heroics like in the last Test if they are to win this. A draw is most likely if England can avoid the follow on but otherwise Oz are likely to retain the Ashes.

Day Three

The England batsmen were good enough to avoid the follow on, just. Burns made the highest score of the innings before Hazlewood had him caught by Smith in the slips for 81 then a couple of overs later Root joined him lbw to Hazlewood for 71. Roy hung around for longer than he does usually until Hazlewood knocked his stumps over for 22.

Stokes and Bairstow then made a determined stand and took the score to 200 for 5 until bad light stopped play. There was no further play that day with Stokes on 7 and Bairstow on 2 with England still 297 runs behind the Ozzies.

Day Four

Bairstow soon had his stumps rattled by Starcky for 17 followed a few overs later by Stokesy who edged an outswinger from Starcky to Smithy for 26. Those two were England last hope of redemption apart from Buttler who has not played that well in this series so far but this time he played a better innings scoring 41 before being clean bowled by Cummins. Archer played a useless innings for before he was caught behind off Cummins for 1 and Broad went for 5 clean bowled by Starc but he and Leach did stay with Buttler to allow him to make a useful score as did Leach who was not out 4.

So England were all out for 301, 196 runs behind Orstralia and still in with an outside chance if they could bowl them out cheaply but a draw still seemed the more likely result depending how quickly Oz could score.

Warner began in his usual fashion by being lbw to Broad to complete the pair of ducks and getting his usual boos. I reckon even the Oz supporters were booing him by now. Broad had Harris in the same fashion a few overs later for 6 then Archer did the same to Labuschagne for 11 and Oz were 24 for 3 but the bogey man Smithy was still there.

Head stayed with Smithy to score 12 before Archer bowled him then Smithy found a partner in Wade until Archer had him caught behind for 34 and in came Paine. Smithy was the last to go, caught by Stokes off Leach for 82. Paine was eventually not out 23 when he declared on 186 for 6 with Starc not out 3 and put England in to bat for the last 7 overs of the day. What would Oz do without Smithy?

Things then got even worse for England if that were possible. Cummins had Burns caught by Head for a Duck on his third ball of the first over and clean bowled Root on the next ball also for zero. At the close Denly was still there on 11 as was Roy on 8 with England on 18 for 2 and needing 365 runs to win with a day to do it.

Barring further heroics from Stokesy that total looks even more impossible than Headingly on this wicket so Pommie fans will be praying to the rain gods. The weather forecast however is good so the only hope is for someone to do a Geoffrey Boycott and stay there all day. My forecast is for England to lose this one and therefore Oz to retain the Ashes.

Day Five

And my forecast proved correct except that I did not anticipate England would put up as good a fight as they did. I would go as far as to say that if Burns and Root had not been bowled so quickly last night we might even have won the game.

Roy was the first wicket of the day, clean bowled by Cummins in textbook fashion for 31. Next was Stokes who was caught behind from Cummins and walked off in disgust without waiting for a decision. Denly had a better innings before being caught by Labuschagne from Lyon for 53. Bairstow and Buttler offered some resistance before the former was lbw to Starc for 34 and the latter bowled by Hazlewood for 21.

That was the end of the established batsmen but the tail put up a spirited partnership once Archer had departed lbw to Lyon in the guise of Cidermen Overton and Leachy who held out to within 14 overs of close of play before Labuschagne had Leachy caught by Wade for 12 and Hazlewood had Overton lbw for 21 leaving Broad not out 0 and England 197 all out. Australia winning the game by 185 runs and retaining the Ashes.

In the games that Steve Smith played Oz scored 1858 runs of which Steve hit 671 of them. He had the highest score of 210, the best batting average of 134.2, three hundreds and 79 fours. His replacement Labuschagne scored four 50's and 38 4's as well as having the third best batting average of 58.2 after Ben Stokes who was second on 59 and scored 11 sixes. These stats show how outclassed England were in the batting department.

The Oz pace bowlers were also phenomenal. Pat Cummins took the most wickets on 24 with Stuart Broad on 19. Labuschagne, Cummins and Hazlewood were the most economical. England missed Anderson.

The record for the batsman with the most ducks was tied between Warner and Root with three each, two very good batsmen who are out of form but Warner took eight catches and was top in the fielding department. Australia deservedly retain the Ashes but would probably not have done so without Steve Smith.

This was the final weekend of the international warm up games before the Rugby World Cup in Japan. England played Italy in Newcastle at St James's Park with over 50,000 spectators, (h'away the lads) and Wales played Ireland in Dublin after being beaten in Cardiff the previous week. Scotland played Georgia at Murrayfield It was also the fifth week of the NZ regional Mitre 10 cup games so if you have no interest in Rugby Union do not click here...

As expected England beat Italy and managed to keep them scoreless 37-0. The score belies the game though as Italy were not that bad and England were not that good. They failed to cross the try line in the first half leading 9-0 from three penalties off Farrell's boot. Joe Launchbury, Cowan-Dickie and Kyle Sinckler all came off with injuries so what with Mako Vunipola and Jack Nowell already sidelined the England injury list is not looking good.

The good news was that Ben Youngs scored in the second half from a ruck close to the try line and Quins centre Joe Marchant scored from a scrum pass from Youngs. Ellis Genge then scored his first England try followed by Barf man Anthony Watson playing in his club position of full back.

Scotland beat Georgia 36-9 but also suffered an injury to lock Ben Toolis and was taken for concussion tests. Scotland face Ireland in their opening pool game an so can ill afford any injuries to such key players.

Injury also affected Wales game against Ireland in Dublin when Rhys Patchell was taken off with concussion and failed an HIA. Ireland had another good game beating the visitors 19-10 in the last game on home ground for coach Joe Schmidt and Captain Rory Best who looked very emotional as he left the field.

Here in the God Zone the AB fans went wild when their team beat lowly Tonga 92-7 in Hamilton on Saturday. The worlds press are also waxing lyrical about their performance but I turned the TV off before the end of the game as the mismatch between the two sides was so great that even Nemphnet Thrubwell RFC would have beaten Tonga!

Mitre 10 Cup 5th Week

Bay of Plenty played Wellington in Rotorua. The Steamers had most of the ball and dominated the Lions in the scrum but just could not turn it into points. The Steamers were ahead for most of the game until their defence went to sleep in the second half and Lions scored a try to go 6 points ahead. The Steamers came back with a try but missed an easy conversion so it finished 15-16.

At last Bro Phil found some joy as Manawatu found a team they could beat in Northland 31-25 in Balmy Parmie for their first win this season. Southland have yet to win a game and were well beaten in Napier by Hawkes Bay 41-23. Tasman remained unbeaten as they thrashed Counties Manukau 0-36 and North Harbour scraped home against Waikato 38-36 in Albany. Auckland entertained Canterbury at Eden Park and suffered with a Cantabrian resurgence of form 22-32.

The weather forecast is good for the whole 5 days so a draw is unlikely from that perspective but my prediction is that, barring another miracle with the batting and bowling skills at our disposal, Oz will win and probably win well. The match started on 12th September and you can read my comments here...

Orstralia won the toss and strangely put England in to bat as the considered opinion of the locals was that the pitch would become more difficult to bat on in the later days.
Denly was the first wicket to fall, bowled Cummins caught Smith for 27. Root then made a stand with Burns until the latter was caught after lunch by Marsh off Hazlewood for 47 with England on 103 for 2. Not too bad a start compared to previous matches.
Stokes managed to score 20 before Marsh hit him in the balls which was probably painful because two balls later he top edges one to Lyon at point and is out. Too many balls Mr Mannering but if a cricket ball hits Stoksies balls it can do more damage than sandpaper!

Bairstow and Root then form a bit of a partnership and Root makes his 50 until they take tea with England on 169 for 3, Root on 57 and Bairstow 22. Root must have had one to many thinly sliced cucumber sandwiches and suffered some indigestion as a few balls after tea Cummins clean bowls him in mid belch without scoring any more and in came Buttler.
A couple of overs later Marsh had Bairstow plumb lbw and the daft bugger reviewed it. I can imagine Buttler told him not to but he was out anyway and Sam Curran joined him at the crease.

Curran is a young man with a future but is learning his trade in Test cricket. He quickly hooks Cummins for six then a couple of balls later is lbw but Cummins had overstepped his crease and was no balled so Curran escapes. It didn't take Cummins long though for him to get his man, caught by Marsh for 15 off 13 balls. Not exactly Test cricket Sam.
The rot then sets in with Woakes lbw from Marsh for 2 and Archer caught behind off Hazlewood for 9 with England 226 for 8.

Jack Leach joins Buttler so we now have two Somerset Cidermen making a stand as Buttler switches into one day mode and starts to swing the bat. He hits consecutive sixes of Hazlewood. A third six off the same bowler brings up his 50 and Jack holds up the other end on 10 with England 260 for 8. By stumps England had progressed to 272 and Buttler to 64 with England having achieved a respectable first days score.

Day Two

The Cidermen lost their wickets in successive overs on day two. First Buttler was clean bowled by Cummins for 70 and the next over Jack so missed his mate that he was clean bowled by March for 21 leaving Broad not out for 0 and England all out for 294. Marsh justified his recall being the best bowler by far taking 5 wickets for 46.

Warner managed to avoid being bowled by Broad this time but was soon caught behind off Archer for 5 and trudged off to the usual boos. Archer also had the other opener Harris caught by Stokes soon after for 3 and Oz had the usual miserable start of 14 for 2 but they now had 'Bat Man' Smithy at the crease and his sidekick 'Robin' Labuschagne!
They took the score on to 83 before Archer had his 3rd wicket of the day bowling 'Robin' lbw for 48.

The wheels sort of fell off then as Smithy could not find anyone to stay with him. Wade went for 19 lbw to Curran, Marsh was caught by Leach off Archer for 17, Paine was caught behind off Curran for 1 who then had Cummins out for a duck lbw the next ball and Oz were 166 for 7.
Smithy tried to switch into one day mode but Woakes eventually had him lbw for 80 which is an unusual way to get him out despite his habit of walking in front of his stumps. Oz were now 187 for 8.
The tail wagged a bit before Archer mopped up Lyon for 25 and Siddle for 18 with Hazlewood not out and Oz all out for 225. England then had to face 4 overs at the end of the day which they did without loss with Burns not out 4 and Denly not out 1. England lead Australia by 78 runs with 10 wickets remaining.

Well I'll be blowed that was not 'wot I predicted. With the weather forecast perfect, the prospect of the pitch deteriorating and England in the driving seat, I might have to review their prospects. And Archer took 6 wickets for 62. Not a bad day.

Day Three

Burns and Denly took the score up to 54 for a series record fist innings stand before Burns edged a catch to Paine off Lyon for 20. Root was next to go just before lunch, edging a ball from Lyon to Smithy in the slips for 21 with England on 87 for 2. Denly and Stokes then formed a partnership that put England into a match winning position.
First Denly reaches his 4th half century of the series then it was Stokes turn with a six off a full toss from Labuschagne. By tea these two are still there and the score was 193 for 2 with Denly on 82 and Stokes on 57. England were then 262 runs ahead.

Stokes was the first to go after tea, clean bowled by Lyon for 67. Must have been those thinly sliced cucumber sandwiches again! Denly was now on 93 and looking for his first test century but it was not to be. Siddle had him caught by that bugger Smith in the slips for 94. If he's not batting Englands bowlers into submission he is making ridiculous catches and getting our batsmen out.

Bairstow and Buttler were now at the crease and Buttler makes Siddle pay for stoppng Denley getting his maiden Test 100 by hitting two boundaries and a three then Bairstow hits the next ball for four making 15 runs off the over! Marsh has him caught by that bugger Smith again a few overs later for 14. Where would Australia be without Smith?
San Curran joins Buttler and plays a defensive game until the new ball beats him and Cummins has him caught behind for 17. England are now 279 for 6, a lead of 348.

You will see from the screen grab above that bugger Smith flying horizontally just above the ground to catch Woakes, bowled Marsh for 6. He must have a jet engine up his arse or something. How can anyone be so good at every cricketing skill (except bowling). Next over Siddle has Buttler caught by Labuschagne for 47 and we are into the tail end.
Archer (3) and Leach (5) see England though to close of play with the score on 313 for 8, a lead of 382.

If the tail wags a bit all the better but I reckon that lead might be enough. Despite Bat Man and Robin I can't see Oz chasing that total although they have two days in which to do it. They Ozzies did lose their patience and Smith was heard saying to Root "it's an easy game when there's no pressure on" with Stokes being referred to as "Bristol" in reference to Stokesy's fun and games in that city a couple of years ago. Stokes was heard to call Sandy Warner "a fucking prick" and the Umpires eventually had to warn them to cease sledging and behave themselves.

Make no mistake they Ozzies want to win the series, not just retain the Ashes so if England can win this match and draw the series they Ozzies will not be happy bunnies.

Day Four

Jack Leach announces his arrival at the crease by hitting Lyon through the covers for four to huge cheers but in the next over Cummins has Archer caught behind for 3. Broad comes in and hits a short ball from Cummins for 6, misses the next two but third time lucky and hits that for six scoring 12 from this daft bowling. The next over Leach is caught by Hazlewood off Lyon for 9 with Broad on 12 and England 329 all out setting Oz a target of 399 to win. Can they do a Headingly?

We had a Broadly similar start to Orstralia's 2nd innings as Broad knocks Harris's off stump out of the ground for 9. Orstralia are now 18 for 1. Their highest opening partnership for the series. Then Broad gets Warner for the eighth time this series caught by Burns at third slip for 11. We now had Batman (Steve Smith) and Robin (Marnus Labuschagne) at the crease so we can expect a few runs.

And they did take the score to 56 before Leach gets Robin caught behind for 14 and an important partnership is broken with Smith on 15. Wade joins him and together they take the score on to 68 for 3 at lunch with Smith on 18 and Wade on 10, still needing 331 to win.

After lunch England celebrated the dismissal of Smithy for a measly 23 runs when Stokesy catches him at leg slip from Broad who now has 3 wickets for 34. England are ecstatic. Wade and Harris must now form a long partnership if Oz are to have any chance of winning.
Woakes has Marsh caught by Burns on 6 but has overstepped the crease and is no-balled. Eventually Root brings himself on and has Marsh caught by Buttler at Short Leg for 24 and another promising partner ship is broken as Wade has now reached his 50.

Paine comes on and they take the score on to 200 for 5 before Leach traps Paine lbw for 21 with Wade on 78. Cummins enters the fray but they must know by now the task is impossible but he plays a support innings as Wade makes his 100 before Broad has him caught behind for 9. Rooty eventually brings himself on again, Wade advances down the pitch to slam him out of the ground, misses, and is stumped by Bairstow. The next over Root catches Lyon off Leach for 1 who then repeats the duo's success getting Hazlewood for a duck and England have won.

Broad took 4 wickets for 62 but Jack Leach had the better figures taking 4 wickets for 49. Wonder boy Acher was wicketless and Joe Root might give up batting and take up bowling!!

The Rugby World Cup (RWC) begins next weekend so I will have so many games to watch and comment on that the Mitre 10 competition will have to take a back seat after this round but I will tag on an update at the end of each RWC report.
The Japanese are big AB fans and they are being given a fantastic reception with kids doing the haka.
The Welsh also seem to have a load of supporters among the locals, even singing the Welsh national anthem which is in Welsh unless you are English and singing the whales version.
Nobody loves the English team who are universally disliked of course!
This week saw our Bay of Plenty Steamers travel to New Plymouth to take on Taranaki who they managed to beat handsomely 17-31.
If you are interested in all the other results you can read about them here...

Waikato hosted Hawkes Bay at Hamilton and it was a close fought game of 4 tries each, the difference being an early penalty goal from Hawkes Bay. Canterbury went up North and thrashed Northland 12-42 while Southland maintained their beaten record losing to Manawatu at home 26-31. Southland were leading 4 tries to 2 at half time but couldn't score a point in the 2nd half. But, much to the delight of Bro Phil, Manawatu came back with a second try from son of Balmy Palmy Ngani Laumapi who the AB's mysteriously left behind from the RWC trip then Rhys Pederson touched down and left it to Otere Black to convert and later sealed the deal with a penalty goal.

Counties Manukau met Auckland at Pukekohe and were beaten 13-28. Wellington thumped Otago at the Westpac 54-24 and finally Tasman held on to their unbeaten record against North Harbour at Nelson 21-17.

So Tasman remain at the top of the Premiership with Wellington and Auckland unchanged in 2nd and 3rd. Canterbury moves up to 4th place while North Harbour drops to 6th place as Waikato takes their place in 5th. Counties-Manukau remains in 7th.

In the Championship the standings are unchanged from last week. The top two teams, the Steamers and Hawkes Bay meet on 28th September in the battle of the Bays in Tauranga but the Steamers have a less challenging game next weekend when they travel up to meet Northland.

If you have absolutely no interest in rugby union then please do not click here....

The first game was between host nation Japan and Russia who have only been playing the game for five minutes and are ranked 20th in the world so were not expected to offer any serious threat against Japan who are ranked 9th in the world. South African born Japanese winger Kotaro Matsushima, who plays for the 'Tahs, was the star of the match who scored three tries in a convincing 30-10 victory which pleased the local fans no end.

The next pool game was Australia v Fiji who came out of the traps fast and quickly had the Wallabies wobbling. It took Oz over an hour to finally overtake the flying Fijians but they eventually tired as the Wobblies took control helped ironically by Samu Kerevi who is Fijian and scored one of their six tries and Tongan Tolu Latu who scored two. Marika Koroibete also scored a try for the Wobblies so perhaps they would not have beaten the Fijians without a little help from their Fijians. Can't see the Ozzies beating Wales next week.

You never know if France are going to turn up but in the first half of this game we saw some of the old French flair which all rugby fans love to watch. So at half time the Frogs were deservedly 20-3 up but in the second half it was all Argentina who scored 21 points and apart from a 3 point drop goal Les Bleus scored "points nill". Los Pumas were all pissed off and handbags were thrown after the final whistle before they all embraced and shook hands as rugby players do. The Frogs survived 23-21 but Kiwi hearts are thumping as they will dread meeting they Froggies in the finals.

The final game of the day was the crunch game between South Africa and New Zealand. It began with the Springboks completely in control and the AB's completely out of it. During the first 20 minutes the rushed defence of the Boks had them completely outplayed. However the Boks failed to turn that first dominance into points however and the AB's soon calmed down to lead 17-3 at the break. In the second half the Boks came back and in particular Cheslin Kolbe was impressive in his determination to get to the try line but solid AB defence prevented him.
For the Blacks the Barrett bro's had excellent games with Lienart-Brown and Ardie Savea also exceptional. They should now win their pool, as if they wouldn't, so are unlikely to meet Ireland in the quarter finals which is a blessing for both teams.

Even when we lived in Cheltenham we would have had problems with our slow broadband connection but if you want to know what happened on the rugby field then please click here...

Italy played Namibia in one of two games which featured teams that were unevenly matched. In this case half of the Namibians were not even professional players but they never the less scored the first try and it was well worked. The Azzurri took an age to get on top but of course they eventually got their act together and overwhelmed the half amateur side 47-22

The game between Ireland and Scotland was a completely different affair except that Ireland completely stuffed the Scots who were unable to find a way around the Irish defence. You would have thought it was a six nations game the way 'Fields of Athenry' was ringing around Yokohama stadium as Scotland were demolished 27-3. Assuming Scotland can play a bit better in the remaining pool games they might qualify in second which would mean them meeting the AB's in the quarter finals which doesn't give them many prospects of progressing further.

Now we come to England's mismatch against Tonga. Only a few weeks ago the Blacks beat Tonga in Hamilton 92-7 so nobody was expecting England to lose this one. As it happened England did struggle a bit and the Tongans played a lot better. Class eventually won the day with England getting a valuable bonus point for their four tries and preventing Tonga crossing their try line. No English injuries were reported after such a bruising encounter so it was an uninspiring success and Eddie professed his satisfaction although the camera did catch him mouthing some naughty words! England Won 35-3.

Tuilagi scored two of the tries and our Barf boys Sam Underhill and Anthony Watson had a good game with JJ coming in off the bench making his presence felt. Incidentally Barf went down to Sandy Park and were well beaten by Executer 28-11 but it was this silly Premiership Cup where they field inexperienced sides to give the academy players experience so has no bearing on the first XV. The sides will play four games before the premiership proper begins with Barf v Brissle on 19th October.

Mitre 10 Cup Rugby 7th Week

As predicted Bay of Plenty had an easy time of it up north beating Northland 22-46. Top of the Championship Hawkes Bay played Taranaki at home in Napier and won 35-17. Hawkes Bay will meet Bay of Plenty next week in Tauranga.
Otago played North Harbour away and won 15-21 while Manawatu continued their winning streak beating Canterbury in Christchurch 29-32.
Southland finally found form in Invercargill beating Counties Manakau 42-14 while Tasman kept their top spot in the Premiership beating Waikato in Hamilton 26-35.
Last but not least Auckland lost to Wellington at Eden Park 15-34.

So in the Premiership the top two places are unchanged then Auckland drops to 4th and Waikato to 6th.
In the Championship the top three places are unchanged. Manawatu moves up to 4th displacing Taranaki and Southland moves up from the bottom relegating Northland to the bottom.

Since my last report there have been a few more pool games played including Wales v Georgia and England v Canada but if you are not interested in Rugby Union then do not click here...

Wales met Georgia on Monday in Toyota City. Jonathan Davies opened the scoring for Wales inside two minutes. Londons big but Biggar's Biggar failed to convert but slotted a penalty a couple of minutes later to put Wales 8-0 up.
Georgia hardly had time to draw breath before Welsh Croatian Justin Tipuric went over for another Try, then, not to be outdone, over goes Josh Adams. Just before the break the bandy legged Saracen Liam Williams gets his try and Wales go in for orange sucking 29-0.

Georgia was the first to score in the 2nd half when they go over from a lineout on the 5 metre line. Tomos Williams went over for another try in the 4th quarter then Georgia scored again as Wales go to sleep. Mind you 'tis bloody 'ot yer boy.
Of course George North had to have his six penneth. Six tries by six different players made a good RWC start for the Welsh who will probably meet England in the quarter final. The final score was 43-14.

Samoa also claimed a bonus point win against Russia in a rough old 3 yellow card game in Kumagaya. It finished 9-34.
The surprise of the tournament so far was Fiji v Uruguay. The game was played in Kamaishi which is known as "Rugby Town" and the stadium was built to commemorate the 1,300 residents who died in the 2011 tsunami.
Uruguay had only ever won one RWC game in its history and are a team of mostly amateurs but they got their noses in front and held off an error ridden Fiji to win the game 27-30.

Italy have certainly progressed since Conor O'Shea took charge and they began the contest really well with a bonus point win against Namibia and Canada is ranked just above Namibia. Italy put on of their best performances yet and without the help of their icon Sergio Parisse. Gloucester player Jake Polledri was man of the match as the Azzuri scored 7 tries to win 48-7 for yet another bonus point win.

England selected their reserve XV to meet with the USA Eagles in Kobe. This was a more impressive performance than their opening game and England dominated the scrums and lineouts from the start. Our Barf boys were very involved while Captain George Ford bossed things and was man of the match.
It didn't take him long to score the first try, skipping through a hole in the defence to touch down under the posts.

Next was Billy Vunipola, one of the four players to have played in the game four days previous. 10 minutes later it was Executer hooker Luke Cowan-Dickie and England went in at the break 19 nill up.
They continued where they left off after the break when Barf legend Jonathan Joseph wove his way through the traffic to be brought down just short of the try line. Fordie quickly whipped the ball out of the ruck to Barfs flying winger Joe Cokanasiga who went over for the bonus point try. 5 minutes later Joe scored his second, barging through three defenders to score England's 5th.

It wasn't long before Barf's utility back Ruaridh McConnochie dotted down for the 6th followed by Lewis Ludlam who made it 7 with England 45-0. They rather let the side down by conceding a try in extra time but the Yanks lost flanker John Quill to a red card for his no arms high tackle on Owen Farrell leaving him with a bloody nose for which a few handbags were thrown.

All together a fine start to their RWC but England have the two most difficult teams to meet next and can not expect such an easy ride out of this pool of death!

The weekend saw some of the high tier nations back in action including Argentina, South Africa, Ireland, Australia and Wales and there was one huge upset. Those of you who have absolutely no interest in what that huge upset was should certainly not click here....

After the England v USA game on Thursday there were no games at all on Friday. First off on Saturday was Argentina against Tonga and Los Puma's went quickly into a commanding lead in the first half with prop Julian Montoya scoring three tries going in at the break 28-7 up.

Tongan No 8 Maama Vaipulu was his usual aggressive self and the Kiwi commentator kept saying "Mama, just killed a man" which for those snowflakes too young to know was a line from Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody. I anticipate he will get fined by the IRB for inciting hatred or something!

Tonga came back in the second half with a single try while the Pumas scored nothing after they took off Montoya. If they play like that against England they will be on a hiding to nothing.

Jamie Joseph, the Kiwi coach of Japan, said before they played Ireland that nobody gave them any chance of beating them.

Japan meanwhile, who are used to this climate, were slotting penalty goals and at half time were only 3 points behind.

The crowd went delirious when later in the second half Japan scored a try to put them two points ahead.
What's this? Lowly Japan leading one of the best teams in the world? Surely Ireland would come back at them and they did try but Japan were so much better and determined not to lose their hard fought lead. They had all the possession and further extended their lead later when Connor Murray of all people went offside in front of his goal posts. Tamura, who kicked well throughout, slotted the penalty to put Japan 19-12 ahead.

At the end, in extra time Ireland turned them over on their try line and had one chance left to draw but had to keep possession. Some Irish idjit who shall be nameless promptly kicked the ball out, perhaps because they were afraid of losing the losing bonus point, so ending the game and their chances of a draw. Young Japanese ladies had to be calmed down from fits of hysteria!!

Well they beat the Boks at the last world cup and were the darlings of Brighton but now they have gone one better and beaten Ireland on home soil to go top of their pool. They should beat Samoa then look out Scotland. If they win their pool they could meet they Jarpies yet again in a mouth watering quarter final.

And what of Ireland? If they are runners up in the pool they will almost certainly meet the All-Blacks in the quarter final. They were expected to win the pool and avoid that calamity but this result makes that forecast a distinct possibility. That scenario is not what either team would want. It might give the Blacks some collywobbles because surely Ireland will come good eventually or do they fear France even more?

No surprises then when the Springboks beat Namibia in Toyota City where they did a comprehensive demolition job scoring nine tries to win 57-3.

Georgia played Uruguay in Kumugaya on Sunday with the latter full of confidence from their surprise win over Fiji, however they were brought back to earth with a bump as Georgia thumped them 33-7.

The final game of the weekend was between Australia and Wales in Tokyo and I expected (and hoped) Wales would give they Ozzies a bloody good thrashing even though they hadn't beaten them in the RWC since 1987. They did beat them last year in Cardiff and on current form they Wobblies were due a slap with a wet leek.

Wales came out breathing fire and had the Wobblies wobbling on the back foot for most of the first half, going in at the break 8-23 but rugby is a game of two halves and in the 2nd half the Welsh decided to defend their lead rather than extend it. Oz managed to get back to within one point before Patchell, who place kicked immaculately throughout, kicked a penalty so Oz had 10 minutes left to score a try which they failed to do so Wales won 25-29.

There is some considerable controversy over a decision by French ref Romain Poite who awarded Wales a penalty kick from which Wales scored on advice from the TMO. Kerevi was carrying the ball and lead with his forearm into Patchell's neck. Hooper argued with the ref that it was Patchell's fault for poor tackling technique but Poite insisted it was dangerous and stuck to his decision.

There are two schools of thought here as in general you can get away with murder if you are holding the ball, however, there is no need to hold the ball as high as Kerevi does and if he held it lower then his free arm would have been lower and would not have put Patchell's windpipe in danger of a karate chop. Wobbly coach Cheika is spitting blood though about the ref and could find himself in trouble if he continues in this vein.

I saw Eddie Jones in the crowd and I expect if England manages to come top of their pool that he would rather play Oz than Wales, however as far as I can see, whoever won or lost will be the winner or runner up respectively of the pool so there is no advantage to be gained as both would meet a strong tier one side from the pool of death; England, France or Argentina.

Mitre 10 Cup Rugby 8th Week

It was the battle of the bays in Tauranga this weekend when the Bay of Plenty Steamers met unbeaten Hawkes Bay Magpies who were riding high at the top of the Championship.
Record crowds turned out at the Tauranga Domain to watch the Steamers annihilate the Magpies 51-24 with local hero Chase Tiatia scoring a hat trick.

Otago once again defended the Ranfurly Shield against Waitomo in Dunedin 45-35 and Southland extended their losing record away to Taranaki 19-0.
Having won three games on the trot, Manawatu could not keep it up and lost to North Harbour in Balmy Palmy 16-29 to the continued disgust of bro Phil.
Northland were away to Wellington and lost 57-36.

In the Premiership Tasman nilled Auckland 40-0 and Canterbury beat Counties Manukau 38-5

The only change to the Premiership table was North Harbour displacing Auckland in fourth place.
In the Championship the Steamers win put them only three points adrift of Hawkes Bay at the top and they have an easier run in meeting Manawatu next week in Tauranga.
Taranaki displaces Manawatu in 4th place

Here was Rod Liddle spouting his usual humorous journalism in his Sun column about the current crop of politicians and their nonsensical attitude to Brexit when he mentioned his membership of the Social Democratic Party (SDP) who I thought had merged with the Liberal party back in 1988 to form the LibDems. I therefore thought that Liddle was a member of a party who supported remaining in the EU which conflicted with his journalistic writings?

I had not realised that the SDP had reformed itself in 1990, was disbanded and then reformed again in 1992 but has had little or no electoral success. In March this year Rod Liddle joined the party which purports to be left of centre on economics and right of centre on defence and social issues.

Liddle has been controversial throughout his career but, whatever you may think of him as a person, he does often reflect a majority view on subjects most journo's are too politically correct to broach and is usually funny with it.

Meanwhile the UK parliament has been reconvened after the supreme court ruled proroguing for five weeks was illegal so all the remainer MP's are back working desperately on cunning plans (as Baldrick would say) to extend EU membership or to prevent Brexit altogether. They are trying to form a government of "national unity". Seems a bit of a misnomer to call a government composed almost entirely of remainers a government of national unity especially as they seem to be having problems finding unanimity?

I have been looking at some comparative voting figures which make interesting reading.

Most people know that in the referendum 17.4 million of us voted to leave the EU and 16.1 million voted to remain. In our parliamentary democracy we all vote for an MP on a first past the post system so how did we vote in each constituency? The answer is that 406 constituencies voted to leave and only 242 voted to remain. Interesting that so I looked a little further.

How many constituencies with Labour MP's voted leave? 148 voted leave and only 84 voted to remain. It was a similar picture in the Conservative constituencies. 247 voted leave and 80 voted to remain. So the question now is does our parliamentary system elect MP's who reflect the majority views of the voters. Only 162 MP's are leavers whereas 485 of them are remainers yet the majority were elected on manifesto's that promised we would leave. It is no surprise that most of us Brits have such a poor regard for politicians these days.

New Zealand Voting

We have both just voted for the first time in the local Bay of Plenty local elections and found it confusing to say the least.
Until 1994 NZ had a First Past the Post system like the UK but then changed to a Mixed Member Proportional (MMP) voting system. They had a referendum in 2011 to revert to the old system but nearly 58% of voters voted to keep the MMP.

The MMP system favours smaller parties who would have little representation under the old system but it also makes it more difficult to get a clear majority government so we now have a coalition of Labour, Greens and New Zealand First parties with the National party who won the most votes in opposition who would be a minority government under the old voting system.
When the preference votes are added the minority Labour government scraped in with 50.39% of the vote and Labour are experiencing the inevitable problems that coalition brings.

In the local elections here in Tauranga there are 10 candidates for the Mayor. As new residents we had little chance to discover who might make a good mayor. Then we had to rank them one to ten. How on earth do you do that even if your have lived here all your life.
I tried to decide who were total wankers and began from the bottom and worked up. The danger is your preference vote might get a total wanker elected!
Then there were dozens of people standing for the city and regional councils. I just voted for the number of places available in each council and did not record a preference greater than that.

In the local paper this weekend there was a guy convicted of criminal assault who is standing for council. We hope he wasn't one of those we voted for! There is a movement afoot to revert back to the old system here in NZ.

A lot has happened since my last comments a week ago but if you are interested in my take on the tournament and the Mitre 10 Cup games here in New Zealand then please click here...

The first game to report on played on Monday at Kobe was Scotland v Samoa. Johnny Gray was Man of the Match which Scotland won 30-0 to gain a valuable bonus point against a lacklustre Samoa who seemed to have given up on this tournament. Gregor Townsend reckoned that on that performance Scotland were a force to be reckoned with but I would prefer to reserve judgement until they meet Japan who could knock them out of the running the way they are playing.

The French turned up at intervals in their game against the USA but somehow managed to get a bonus point 33-9 win? They will have to play a lot better when they meet England, meanwhile the Blacks nilled Canada 63-0 which delighted folks around here but left Graham Henry in a dilemma as he is helping Canada as an advisor. Maybe he is a fifth columnist for the Blacks! Just another predictable result.

Georgia succumbed to Fiji 10-45 who will meet Wales next for a very different encounter and Ireland nilled Russia in a five try 30-0 victory which will give them a bit more confidence after their loss against Japan.

Australia were given two yellow cards for needless high tackles against Uruguay who fought back valiantly but were completely outclassed 45-10 with Oz scoring 7 tries to Uruguay's 1. Oz had on what they called "indigenous" jersey's which the "indigenous" Man of the Match Fijian Tevita Kuridrani was proud to wear. As far as I am aware the only Wobbly of aboriginal descent is Curtly Beale.

Now we come to the long awaited crunch match between England and Argentina. Lots of folks down here fancied they Puma's to beat us as many of their players are familiar faces in the Jaguares Super Rugby franchise who they know well. What they are less familiar with is that England play the Pumas regularly home and away and they have not beaten us for 10 years. Also many of them play for English clubs so we know them well and how they play.

Early on in the game Welsh ref Nigel Owens red carded Thomas Lavanini for a dangerous tackle on Owen Farrell when his shoulder came into contact with Farrell's neck. It was a wonder that Farrell bounced back up from that or that he was not sent off for an HIA. There has been the inevitable controversy over if a red card was justified. All I have to say is that the IRB have instructed the refs to protect players from high tackles with severe sanctions and the refs are duty bound to do so. Nigel Owens is one of the best refs in the world so don't blame the refs for following orders.

England then had the advantage of playing a 14 man team for the remaining hour of play which they did with impressive if uninspiring efficiency achieving their desired objective of a bonus point 39-10 win to put Argentina out of contention to reach the finals. Barf boy Sam Underhill was man of the match for his sterling defensive work while George Ford bossed the game and Owen Farrell left his kicking boots at home missing his first four kicks at goal.

Just they Frogs to beat now to emerge top of the pool but you never know if they will turn up. What is certain is they will have to play for 80 minutes if they are to beat England. I don't think it matters much as whatever the result they will meet either Wales or Australia in the quarter finals who are equally hard to beat.

Japan did the business against Samoa gaining a bonus point 38-19 win to go top of their pool. They will meet Scotland next and if they win that will relegate Ireland to runners-up which means Ireland meeting New Zealand in the quarter final. Ireland have beaten NZ in two of the last three games they have met. Could they do it again?

New Zealand played Namibia and if you were to bet on Namibia beating the Blacks you would be classed as a raving idiot but the Blacks had to work hard in the first half against an enthusiastic bunch of mainly amateurs. They failed to boss the game, collected two yellow cards for high tackles and made countless errors giving penalties away which the Namibian midget fly half Damian Steven converted into points on three occasions. Sanity eventually prevailed as the AB try count rose and at the break the score was 24-9.

Hansen must have given them a good talking to as the AB's came out a reformed side and proceeded to demolish the opposition culminating in a fantastic try from T J Perenara which must be the try of the tournament so far. Jordie Barrett played 1st 5/8 for a change and did well as they only have two other players who normally play at 10. Brodie Retallick survived half an hour and retired fit. Sevu Reece scored two of the eleven tries as did Lienert-Brown who was man of the match.

The final game of the week was in Kumamoto where France met Tonga which you would expect to be a similar one sided game. Nothing of the sort as France turned up with their usual patches of brilliance interspersed with numerous handling errors and a seeming lack of initiative. Yet again they seemed unable to play well for much of the game whereas Tonga gave it the welly from the start and never gave up.

Tongan errors and French brilliance combined to give they Frogs a 17 nill lead until just before half time Takulua put the Tongans back in the game with a try which was converted. Tonga came out after the break to quickly score another try to put les merdes up the Frogs and the score within 3 points at 17-14. France scored a couple of penalties to increase their lead but a late converted Tongan try from Kapeli made the final score 23-21. But for a slack first half Tonga would have beaten the bastards!

Mitre 10 Cup Rugby 9th Week

I describe the Steamers v Manawatu game below which I attended but suffice to say their bonus point win put them one point nearer Hawkes Bay at the top who beat Counties Manukau 10-22.
North Harbour beat Wellington at home 42-34 while Auckland bean Southland 64-7.
Down in Dunedin Otago finally lost their battle to hold on the Ranfurly Shield when they lost to Canterbury 23-35.
Tasman predictably gave Northland a thashing in Nelson 52-6 while in the derby at Hamilton Waikato beat Taranaki 38-19.

In the premiership there was no change of position of any team in week 9 likewise in the championship.

I went to my first Mitre 10 Cup rugby match at Tauranga Domain with bro in-law and Manawatu supporter Phil and his bro in-law Graham who is a staunch Bay of Plenty Steamers fan. They were both dressed in their respective team strip while I had on my Barf shirt just to confuse the locals! Phil knew most of the Manawatu players personally who he encouraged with words of support when we encountered them as they emerged from their coach as we arrived at the ground and we quickly found seats in the grandstand for the very reasonable price of $25.

We then watched the ladies Bay of Plenty Volcanics play Manawatu Cyclones while Graham went off and came back with trays of cheeseified chips but no beer was consumed which felt strange!
The Bay ladies were losing at half time 10-17 which Phil reckoned was an omen for the mens game to follow, however, in the second half the Volcanics big girls showed their superior fitness and beat the Cyclones 30-17. Mind you some of these girls bought to mind deck hands and whalers that you would not want to be tackled by!

The main event began with Manawatu Turbo's getting the first points with a penalty kick quickly followed by the BOP Steamers replying with a try to go 5-3 up and by half time increased their lead to 15-3 at which point bro Phil warned us the Turbo's would warm up in the second half while complaining of a numb bum from the wooden seats!
The Steamers resumed completely dominating the game and effectively keeping the Turbo's star player Ngani Laumape from getting his hands on the ball apart from a forward pass resulting in a disallowed try.

With the game finely poised on 27-3 as Joe Ravouvou touched down for his hat trick of tries, bro Phil declared that Manawatu would finally get warmed up in the last quarter and they did succeed in getting a try when a clearing kick was knocked down and pounced on over the Steamers try line.
The final score of 46-10 Phil declared a close result and puts the Steamers in a good position to host the finals at Tauranga and the prospect of promotion to the Premiership.

The tournament will progress next weekend to the knockout stage quarter finals and we now know the teams that will contest those for a place in the semi finals. We can also hypothesize as to who is likely to make the final. There have been some surprises in the final pool game results but if you have no interest in the contest for one of the finest sporting trophies in the world the please leave this web site and do not click here....

Of the final pool games several were wholly predictable but some were a surprise.

The Boks thrashed Canada 66-7, Argentina beat the USA 14-17, Scotland nilled Russia 66-0 and Ireland beat Samoa 47-5, all predictable results.
Wales struggled against Fiji from the off with the latter going 10-0 up in the first 10 minutes. Wales came back later with two tries but Fiji regained the lead with a penalty try after the break. Biggar came under friendly fire after a collision with winger Liam Williams and was taken off injured, replaced by Rhys Patchel who then evened the score before Wales dominated a tiring Fiji to score two more tries for the bonus points finishing 29-17.
Fiji winger Semi Radradra was named Man of the Match but his side will not qualify for the play offs.

Orstralia also struggled against Georgia and will qualify as runners up in pool D to Wales which means they will meet England in the quarter finals. They eventually managed a bonus point 27-8 win but if they play like that against England, undercooked or not, they will be shown no mercy.

The Japan v Scotland game was not cancelled but the Namibia v Canada game was. Tonga beat the USA 19-31 and Wales made hard work of beating Uruguay and by orange sucking time were only a point to the good at 7-6. Gatland gave them some choice words then and bought the bench on early to eventually win 35-13 to go top of their pool.

The big upset, at least for Scotland, was getting knocked out of the running by Japan who completely outclassed a poorly performing Sweaty side going in at the break 21-7 up! Not only did they perform badly but the Brave Blossoms got right up the Scots noses as did 60,000 hysterical fans so that they were arguing with the Kiwi ref about his decisions especially Finn Russell and the Hogweed should certainly get a new barber!

It was however an excellent game of Rugby and the Scots never gave up as they came back to within a converted try but it was not to be as Japan held on for an historic 28-21 win finishing top of their pool and condemning Ireland to a quarter final crunch game against the AB's.

So England will play Australia, New Zealand will play Ireland, Wales will play France and Japan will play South Africa in the quarter finals.
My predictions for the semi finals are therefore that England will play New Zealand and Wales will play South Africa. Watch this space.

Mitre 10 Cup Rugby 10th Week

The Bay of Plenty met Southland who had not won a game this season and gave the Steamers a scare in Invercargill but they eventually weathered the storm to win 12-22. Taranaki lost to Auckland at home 11-35 and Hawkes Bay thankfully lost to Tasman 28-47 which propelled the Steamers to the top of the Championship.

Down in Balmy Parmie Manawatu did to Counties Manukau what the Steamers had done to them last week and triumphed 33-17 while Wellington beat Waikato 39-21. Otago couldn't stand the heat up North as they lost to Northland 40-10, finally Canterbury beat North Harbour 31-25.

In the premiership Auckland moved up above North Harbourand in the Championship Manawatu moved up a place displacing Taranaki and Northland moved up a place.

Now we come to the play-offs. The Steamers will play Manwatu in Rotorua, Tasman will play Auckland in Blenheim, Hawkes Bay will play Otago in Napier and Wellingto will play Canterbury at home.

You now have the option to read my comments on the quarter finals of the RWC but if you are Orstralian or Irish or French or Japanese you may not wish to click here...

As predicted England demolished Oz which brought great joy to the Biddle household. Oz came out of the blocks fast but Englands defence stood form until a high tackle from Billy Vunipola in front of the posts won a penalty which Christian Lealiifano slotted.
England always looked like scoring and it wasn't long before Tom Curry fed Jonny May who went over in the corner converted by Farrell who, unlike the previous game, didn't miss a kick in this game.

Two minutes later Henry Slade makes a break and executes a perfect little grubber kick which bounces into Jonny May's arms who goes over for another try and Oz is shell shocked!
Slade is later accused of not rolling away from a tackle and Lealiifano gets his second penalty goal before committing the same offence himself and England's lead is restored.
He makes up for it just before half time with another penalty goal and they go in at the break with England 17-9 up.

Oz came back to within a point of England early in the second half. That Koroibete can certainly shift as he out sprinted Daly to the line and Oz were back in the game after Lealiifano converted.
Oz had tried to wind up tight head Kyle Sinckler after a scrum penalty in the first half with a gentle pat on the head from his opposite number but he did not bite and promptly restored Englands lead as he bolted through a big hole in the Oz defence to score a few minutes later. Then he wins a penalty in front of the Oz posts just to rub it in further!

By this time it was all England who had complete control of the game with an impenetrable defence, Barf boy Sam Underhill and Sam Curry working in perfect unison. Barf are missing him and Anthony Watson as they lost heavily to Brissle on Friday night. Watson always looked dangerous and eventually intercepted a loose pass from Curtley Beale to score Englands 5th try as they knocked Oz out of the tournament 40-16.

The next game was New Zealand v Ireland who did not turn up and have not played to their full potential in Japan. The All Blacks seem to thrive on Sushi and Chips and have played out of their skins.
Suffice to say the Blacks were 34 nill up before Ireland managed to score in the last quarter. Finally they were awarded a penalty try when Matt Todd dived in front of the posts to prevent a try and got a yellow card for his trouble. Strange decision that as how are you supposed to defend the post if you are not allowed to get between it and the ball carrier without being given offside?

This was Rory Best's last game and he was very emotional at the end as the Irish supporters gave him a rousing send off as they did Joe Schmidt.
So it is an England v New Zealand semi final which if the AB's continue to play as they have done are possibly unbeatable. Eddie seems quietly confident but 'Shag' (Hansen's nickname) has said they will have a beer together after the game whatever the result.

Wales met France who turned up big time and should have won the game until with the score on Wales 10 France 19 in the third quarter, Vahaamahina, who scored a brilliant try in the first half, had a rush of blood to the head in the middle of a maul and elbowed Wainwright's head for which he was given a red card. In the closing minutes of the game Wales managed to score a try as France imploded, winning 20-19.
Even Gatland said the best team lost!

The final match was South Africa v Japan who defeated the Boks at the last world cup. This time they were comprehensively beaten 3-26 but they have done wonders for the game in Japan whose spectators have filled every stadium and the Japanese Jersey was sold out. Japanese girls fainted as their brave blossoms reached the finals for the first time and Barf have given them Tod Blackadder to ensure failure at club level!!

So Wales will meet the Boks in the semi's and unless Gatland has some way to revive them I can not see Wales making the final. So the likely final will be between the AB's and the Boks but I hope I'm wrong as I will lose $20 to Bro Fred!

The Gallagher Premiership began almost unnoticed while we were all still absorbed with the RWC. After three games Northampton Saints were unbeaten at the top and my Barf lot were festering at the bottom. Saracens meanwhile were found guilty of exceeding the salary cap, fined millions and docked 35 points which should take them to the bottom!
To make things worse Barf had to play the Saints at the rec in the fourth round so if you are interested in the result then click here...

Bloody Barf were tanked by Brissle away in the first game of the season, narrowly beat Executer in the second game at home and were beaten by they Waspies at the Ricoh to go bottom of the table after three. The fourth game against the Saints began with a disastrous charge down of a failed clearance kick from Priestland on which Hutchinson pounced and scored for the visitors to go 0-5 up.

James Grayson, son of Paul Grayson ex Saints fly half, missed the conversion but kicked a penalty goal 10 minutes later and Barf were 0-8 down. Paul Grayson has two other sons in the Saints academy so is building a family club!
To compound Barfs misery we then lost Rokoduguni but on came 18 year old Gabriel Hamer-Webb who had a cracking game neutralising Oz winger Taqele Naiyaravoro for the rest of the game.

After 20 minutes Barf scrum half Will Chudley darted over for a try which Priestland converted putting us back in the game 7-8 then another penalty goal put us ahead 10-8 at half time.

Welsh winger Aled Brew was given a red card for a dangerous tackle early in the second half so Barf had to play the rest of the game with 14 men. Nothing daunted they consolidated their lead in the second half after Will Stuart scored in a rolling maul. Saints responded with Tom Wood going over which looked as though he was held up, however, the daft ref asked the wrong question of the TMO "is there any reason I can't award the try" and as the TMO had no sight of the grounding the answer was no so the try was awarded and the score was 15-13.

In the final quarter Barf were camped on the five metre line for ages with a succession of scrum penalties against Saints resulting in a yellow card for all-black prop Ben Franks which evened up the numbers then Paul Hill was given the same treatment and Saints were down to 13 men.
Barf then took advantage as Mercer peeled off the scrum to dive over the line which Priestland converted. With three tries and a man advantage Barf should have scored a bonus point but it was not to be and the game finished 22-13 pushing Barf up to 9th but Brissle did wonders to beat Executer 17-20 at Sandy Park so take the top spot from the Saints.

In other games Sale beat Wasps 28-18, Sarries beat Glaws 12-21 and were third in the table because their 35 point penalty had not been deducted as it was subject to appeal. Worcester Warriors stunned Quins at the Stoop 14-19 and the Tigers didn't get off the bus as London Irish thrashed them at Welford Road 36-11.

European Cup Rugby took over then until Nov 29th when Barf entertain Sarries at the rec. Barfs first European cup game was against Ulster at the rec. Barf spent most of the game in enemy territory but the score line failed to reflect the dominance. It was a typical close cup game with Ulster taking the few chances offered while Barf buggered theirs! In the closing minutes Barf looked like scoring but Jacob Stockdale beat Roko to the ball cross kicked from Zach Mercer and the Ulster men won 16-17.

I have been forced to cough up $20 a month to Spark Sport in order to watch the Heineken Cup games. I watched Quins suffer annihilation at the hands of Clermont Auvergne 53-21 who are in the same pool as Barf and we play Quins at the Stoop next weekend. I also watched Racing 92 hammer the mighty Sarries who are current European champions 30-10. Their over paid star players we mostly absent and their replacement young bloods we outclassed. Scottish international Finn Russell had an impressive game at 10 and scored a brilliant individual try as well as bossing the game.

Sarries then decided not to appeal their punishment for exceeding the salary cap for the last three years and to swallow the £5.4 million fine and 35 premiership penalty points so they are now bottom of the table with minus 22 points. Serves the cheating bastards right but are some of the others not guilty of bending the salary cap rules? No names no pack drill!

Barf did a little better the next week against Quins at the Stoop. They lost 15-9 so that should be the end of our Champions cup attempt for another year barring a miracle as we are now bottom of pool 3 with Ulster top.
In other pools Leinster and Northampton are tied at the top of pool 1, Exeter are clear leaders in pool 2, Racing 92 and Munster are tied at the top of pool 4 with Sarries a close third and Toulouse are clear leaders in pool 5.
Round 3 starts on 6th December with Barf v Clermont at the rec. Winning that one would be a miracle!

The weather turned nice just in time for the match with low twenties for the first two games and hotting up to the high twenties as the match progressed. New Zealand is currently ranked 2nd in the world with England 3rd. The former have been unbeatable at home lately so began as favourites but if test cricket to you is like watching paint dry then do not click here...

England 1st innings

England won the toss and decided to bat much to the amazement of the locals as nobody ever chooses to bat in NZ conditions. This is a new venue for test cricket so nobody knew how the pitch would play over a five day test. Englands opening batsmen were Rory Burns and Dominic Sibley who made a fine start with a partnership of 52 before Sibley was caught behind off de Grandhomme for 22 to be replaced by Joe Denly. Grandhomme also had Burns caught by Taylor in the slips, both batsman edging balls they should have left.

Root then faced 20 balls without scoring before edging another ball from Wagner he should have left, caught by Southee in the slips with England 120 for 3. Denly and Stokes then formed a solid partnership before Denly edged a ball from Southee caught behind by wicket keeper Watling for a patient 74 bringing 21 years old Ollie Pope on who played with a confidence betraying his age.

The score had then progressed to 203 with Stokesy in fine form and looking to make a big score. With Pope anchoring the partnership Stokesy progressed to 91 when Taylor made up for a previous miss, catching him in the slips from Southee but England were still looking good at 277 for 5. Pope edged a ball to Watling 2 overs later as Southee struck again and matters were made worse the next ball when he had Sam Curran out lbw for a duck.

Archer didn't last long either when he slogged a ball down Southee's throat off Boult for 4 but we now had the reliable Somerset pair at the crease in the form of Jos Buttler and Jack Leach who put on 51 until Jos slogged a ball to the covers where he was caught by Santner who was signing autographs seconds before as Wagner began his run in so Jos had perhaps thought nobody was there!

Broad was last man in and we have all forgotten how he once scored a ton. Wagner had him playing on for 1 in his 2nd over and England were all out for 353 with Leach not out 18.
England had begun the 2nd day 245 for 4 with Stokes on 71 and Pope on 18. They should have gone on to a better score than 353 and depending on how the pitch holds up honours looked to me to be even.

New Zealand 1st innings

Sam Curran claimed the first wicket trapping Latham lbw for 18. Latham walked but had he reviewed the replay showed it was bat pad. The Kiwi's do not have the best record of reviewing umpire's decisions. Captain Williamson joined Raval at the crease who never looked comfotable but held on to score 18 until Jack Leach tempted him to slog a ball into the arms of Denly at deep mid wicket. Apparently the last hundred wickets in NZ have been from pace bowlers so that one was an exception. Either that or their spinner Santner is useless?

Taylor joins his captain and the pair move the score on to 106 before Stokes has him caught by Pope at mid wicket. Nicholls arrives at the crease and forms a partnership with Williamson who takes his score to 51 when Curran bowls a bouncer which hits his gloves and sails into Stokesy's grateful hands at slip with NZ now 128 for 4. In comes de Grandhomme to join Nicholls and the pair bat out to the close at 144 for 4.

On the third day all the media had England in the driving seat but Nicholls and Grandhomme had other ideas. These two took the score on to 197 before Root had Nicholls lbw, the 2nd spinner's wicket and probably a world record! In came Watling who with Grandhomme played superb innings with the partnership unbroken until the score reached 316, well in sight of the English first innings total. The first ball after tea was from Stokes who Grandhomme hit to the gully where Sibley took a great diving catch to dismiss him for 65.

Santner joined Watling who was on 79 and the pair battled on until Watling scored his hundred to great acclaim from the Bay crowd. England looked tired after a full hot day in the bay with NZ now having overtaken their 1st inning score at 364 for 6 with Santner on 23 and proving better with the bat than the ball. And Santner was still there at stumps on 31 with Watling on 119, NZ 394 for 6, 41 runs ahead. It was very much New Zealands day.

The fourth day was one of frustration for England and determination for NZ. Santner who had looked to be struggling the previous day must have had some time with the batting coach in the nets because he was ducking and weaving the high balls instead if trying to play them. Watling played the same as he did the previous day and England tried everything they could to break the partnership to no avail.

The pair dug in and both played exceptionally well with the pitch doing nothing, taking the score to 577 before Santner was finally caught by Pope at long on from Curran for 126, his first test 100 and he was given a well deserved standing ovation. Watling was still there on 189 and celebrated his double century just after tea before his new partner Southee was caught and bowled by Leach for 9.

Watling was finally caught behind from Archer for 205, Archers only wicket of the day and NZ declared at 615 for 9. Burns and Sibley laboured for about 20 overs before Sibly played a wide ball he should have left from Santner and was caught behind for 12 then Burns was caught by Grandhomme at slip doing the same thing for 31 and England were 53 for two with Denly at the crease with Leach as night watchman who was caught sensationally by Latham at short leg. Leach didn't review as he didn't want to risk losing a review but had he done so, hot spot showed he had not hit the ball so he would not have been out.

So Santner not only makes his first hundred but takes the first three England wickets and will probably be sainted. England now have to bat through Monday to save the match. Can they do it? I doubt it if they play like our openers.

And as expected England's batsmen struggled on a pitch that did very little on the fifth day. First to go was Root for 11, second was Stokes for 28 and third was Pope for 6, all playing at balls they should have left alone. I can not understand why so many English test batsmen continually make the basic mistake of trying to play balls well wide of the stumps, especially when they are trying to save the match and preserving their wicket is of prime importance. Archer also threw his wicket away on 30 when he seemed well settled to bat for the final hour with Curran who finished 29 not out when Wagner tempted him to slog a ball to the covers and Santner took a brilliant diving catch in one hand.

Wagner was the pick of the bowlers who also clean bowled Buttler out for a duck after facing 18 balls with figures of 5 for 44 as NZ bowled England out for 197 winning by an innings and 65 runs. They start the second and final test in this series at Hamilton on Thursday.

There is one round of Premiership Rugby squeezed in between the European Cup games which begin again on December 6th with Bath v Clermont Auvergne at the rec. Barf have had some success in previous games at the rec against Sarries so if you are an optimist, and you have to be to qualify as a Barf supporter, you can discover the result here...

Barf began well scoring the first points and keeping their noses in front until Sean Maitland went over for a try for Sarries and by the break were ahead for the first time 9-13. Sarries remained dominant in the 2nd half scoring another penalty goal but then Barf full back Tom Homer broke almost up to the 22 where Itoje went off his feet at the breakdown and Priestland kicked the penalty to keep Barf in the game 12-19.

Owen Farrell kicked two more to increase the margin by six more points and even after Itoje was given a yellow card for going over the top Barf could not break Sarries defence and the game finished 12-25. Sarries might be cheats but they do play good rugby and this game reduced their deficit to minus 18 points in the table. Their average points tally over their cheating years was 77 so if they equal their average tally this season they should end up with 42 points so on their performance so far they are pretty safe from relegation.